Dead World I + II

[Shadowz123]

Ive made a few stories which are funny in some way or another! Heres a good one!

Dead World
By Shadowz123

Grant - Theres one!
*bang*
Grant - Another one!
*bang*
Grant - Right there!
*Bang*
Jack - oh god, you shot billy...
Luke - woops! sorry billy...
Bob - juts wait for him to get back up...
(2 hours later)
Grant - i dont think he is getting back up...
(as they walk away, he gets up)
Luke - Behind you!
*Bang*
Grant - What the hell?
Jack - Who cares, lets get back to base
(the 4 drive to the base where they rest till tomorrow)
Grant - *yawn* ah, nice dream...
Luke - What was it?
Grant - i shot billy...
Jack - that wasnt a dream...and luke shot him
Grant - no, i shot billy
Luke - no, i was the only one with a gun...
Jack - yea, or i would of went crazy and shot everyone!
Bob - you would?
Jack - yea! would be good!
Luke - dont ever give jack a gun...
Jack - aww damn man...
(later on that day, they went to go get supplies from the store)
Jack - oooh, sweet! they got new beer in, zombie ale.
Luke - sounds good!
Bob - why is it red?
Jack - meh, i dont care.
Grant - i wouldent drink that jack...
Jack - why not?
Luke - thats Zombie blood...
*smash*
(jack drops the bottle and spits out the blood)
Jack - who would make this stuff?
Luke - Zombies
Jack - oh...i knew that!
Grant - then why did you ask?
Jack - because...ummm
Bob - no time, we gotta move, the zombies have nearly finished their game of twister!
Zombie 1 - put your left hand on the grey circle.
Zombie 2 - they're all grey
Zombie 1 - then put you hand on it
Zombie 2 - my hands over there, can someone get it for me?
Zombie 3 - fine...
(zombie 3 goes to get Zombie 2's hand, as he gets close, the hand scurries away)
Zombie 3 - come here you...get here!
*Crunch*
(the hand snapped at the zombie injuring him and started ripping him apart)
Zombie 3 - oh god, help me!
Zombie 2 - good boy!
Zombie 3 - Ahhhh! it dosent hurt, but im imagining the pain! ow...oooh...eeeek?
Zombie 1 - put ur left foot on the grey circle
Zombie 2 - ok...
*Snap*
(as the zombie went to put the left leg onto the grey circle, the zombie tore in half)
Zombie 2 - aww man, not again, i just got it fixed!
Zombie 1 - tough luck...
*pop*
(zombie 1's head fell off now the zombie are scurrying around finding their body parts, this is the oppurtunity the 4 guys had!)
Bob - ok, Run!
(as they run the hand chases after them)
Luke - tell me how thats possible!
Grant - just run!
Jack - yea! you saw what it did!
Luke - Ahhh!
(in a burst of speed, luke ran off as fast as he can leaving a trail of fire behind him)
Grant - thats so fake...
(as they get back to base, they prepare for war as the zombies gather on the other side of the river)
Jack - Alright bitches! lets do this!
(guns are blazing and the zombies are dying)
Jack - DIE!!!!
(as jack said before, he would go crazy, so he did, everyone died, even him self, where the gun was set to auto fire, and jack peered down the barrel splattering his brains everywhere)

The End!

Dead World II
By Shadowz123

Luke - is he dead?
Grant - yea, the idiot killed himself...jackass
Bob - the plan was to act dead, not actually be dead...*sigh*
Luke - no matter, he was no use anyway!
Grant - yes he was, he was the best in the...
Luke - i said, no matter!
Bob - Cheifs not gonna like this!
(they get back to the chiefs place and tell him about the incident)
Chief - were there not 5 of you?
Luke - yea...but they sorta died...
Chief - How did they die?
Luke - well, billy was shot...by grant
Grant - sorry...
Luke - and Jack killed him self...
Chief - what a bunch of fools, i sent you on one mission...to die! and only 2 got it right!
Bob - im sorry?
CHief - i hate you all! get the hell outta my office before i kill ya'll!
*bang*
Chief - oh shit!
Luke - Run!
Grant - Ahhh!
(they both run out mourning the death of Bob...the fat one!)
Luke - damn, now we dont have anyone to tease! Goddamnit!
*starts kicking jack*
Grant - Umm Luke...
*Keeps kicking*
(he keeps kicking and jacks entire chest was broken, showing his insides)
Luke - oh, thats where my 50c went...
grant - eww...
(they get up and start walking back into town, where they must shoot all zombies!)
Luke - see any?
Grant - nope...all i see is a bunch of people swarming towards us...and a hand?
Luke - oh god! RUN!
Grant - oh hell no!
(the carnivorous hand gives chase, the hand is covered with gold rings and bling bling)
Zombie 1 - my hand! its more famous than me...
Zombie 2 - everyones more famous than you...
Zombie 1 - oh...
Zombie 2 - see, P Deady is over there, Brusher is there and 25c is over there...
Zombie 1 - oh, wow didnt recognize em...
Zombie 2 - also Fatboy Fat, Dead cold chilli peppers...
Zombie 3 - dont forget Christina Ragulera!
Zombie 2 - oh yea...
Zombie 3 - have you seen any movies lately?
Zombie 2 - yea, men in grey!
Zombie 1 - is that any good?
Zombie 2 - nah, its all human actors...
Zombie 3 - oh, thats not cool...
Zombie 2 - yea, but what is lately?
Zombie 1 - my hand...
(the zombies continue chatting until they get bored and go watch the Uncredibles at the movies...Grant and Luke escaped the hand, and found a small house on the hill)
Grant - wow, you can see everything from up here!
Luke - yea...isnt that pamela anderson?
(they look down and see the flat chested wonder, walking on the streets with her skin dangling down)
Grant - haha, *Shouts*hey pamela, why the long face?
Pamela - oh shut up...
(trips over, and gets eaten by the carnivorous hand)
Luke - nice one!
Grant - yea...why didnt we kill the hand?
Luke - i dunno...it seemed friendly to me...
Grant - are you insane? it ripped that zombie to peices...
Luke - oh yea...grab me that sniper rifle!
(grant passes luke the sniper rifle, and luke aims for the hand)
Grant - Fire!
*BANG*
Luke - got it!
(the hand exploded and all its bling bling fell to the ground, then 25c and P Deady fought over it with an arm wrestling competition...both theyre arms broke off...Luke searches the house for any weapons, they come across a box, a box full of 'the Zombie Times', with news like: Jessica Blimpson died again today...and again!; P Deady wrote a new song: Dead like me; and the rest is all faded out)
Luke - damn, these zombies are smart!
Grant - yea...what the hell?
Luke - theyre like real humans!
Grant - yea...but whatever
Luke - oh look, over there!
(luke finds a anti-zombie grenade)
Grant - what are the odds? Who was it made by?
Luke - Dead, Deader & Deadest
Grant - wow...zombies made anti-zombie grenades...
(they gather the grenades and start killing zombies...to be continued!)

The End!

 

[Fladian]

A similar problem as the other "story" you posted. You describe only what the characters are saying and a little bit of general information, which is often far more important than the talking, unless you are describing a phone-call, but I doubt that that is the case.

When I'm reading this, I honestly have no idea what in the world you are talking about. With a quick look on it, I conclude that it is about zombies and a handful of people that kills (or destroys, might be a more accurate description) them for a reason which is not explained... but then again, nothing is explained, which makes the conversation in this "story" one giant blur.

What you posted is hardly a story. At a quick look on it, I could easily mistake it for my document of Quote of the Days, which looks somewhat similar. Even stories I read (amateurs) that don't take them selves serious are better than this, because they simply aren't a conversation and nothing else. Humor-story 'What not to call your dog' describes quite little (never is explained where the main person is, lives or looks like, nor his wife or dog) about his enviroment or himself for that matter. But that might be the point what makes the story superb, because it doesn't take itself serious in any possible way and tries to make a fool out of itself in every sentence, if not paragraph, which makes it one of the highest quality humor stories I've ever read. The only thing it does describe (besides the conversations) is the situation they are in. You could say it is a sort of diary with some exceptional situations. This story lacks everything I just mentioned, which truly isn't a good thing.

As a last note, I find it remarkable that at the end of the "story" it says "to be continued" though only one line beneath it, it says 'The End!'

 

[Undead_Lives]

Meh, it's funny, I've read it before. But technically, it's not a story. More like a screen play.

 

[Arkidas]

Yes, it doesn't encourage you to read it when it's lined up like that. A comic would be nice but not a naked script. People don't really find it worth reading Try to set it up in a story.

 

[Teron Gorefiend.gr]

It is funny,pal, but it doesn't make any sense.I don't think this is a story.It has only dialog.It doesn't explain where the heroes are,or why they do whatever they are doing.

 

[Fladian]

Hmm, I didn't really find it funny either. But that's probably because a kinda script can't make me laugh most of the time.